Saturday, February 27, 2010
Yesterday, I noticed Gussie was staring at the window, then out the french doors in my bedroom. Last night, she came into the living room, and sat on the hassock, watching the tv. At first, we thought she was just seeing light, but today, she was tracking my hand, and it would seem that God turned the lights back on for her.
We are blessed.
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
I want to thank so many of you for asking about Gussie, giving suggestions, and encouragement. We pet lovers know that next to seeing our children suffer, nothing is harder than watching a pet suffer. I don't think she's in pain, but she's frightened, disoriented, and I think, is realizing that the nightime has lasted too long, and would someone turn on the lights, please? She is spending most of her time under the bed, or in her little, round basket. At night, she does get up on the bed, and I go in and spoon with her...talking to her softly and petting her...she purrs like mad.
I took her to the vet, and she told me that due to hypertension, Gussie's retinas have detached, blinding her...the term is "blown retinas". Her blood pressure was way up, and I have meds to give her - very difficult to get them down her, even with the little, expensive "pill pockets"...I end up having to poke them down her throat, and now, she doesn't trust me. She comes out from under the bed (just now), but when I walk in the room and try to talk to her or approach her, she runs back under...I've lost her trust..sigh.
On the initial visit, they did labs for thyroid and kidney disease...trying to find out what is driving the hypertension. Turns out the thyroid is fine, and inconlusive on the kidney, so we go back tomorrow for more tests...How I am going to get her in her carrier is a dilema...Gussie may be blind, but she's a survivor, and she's very smart...
I sleep like a mother with a sick child, with one ear cocked at all times. At three am, she was on the foot of the bed, and she hissed...I think our Raisen startled her. So, have been up since then.
For those who are not cat/pet lovers, I know this sounds like just "high drama", but she's been my darling for fourteen years, and I just want her to be as comfortable as she can be. I won't consider the "final solution" unless she is in pain, or suffering....My vet says cats adjust to blindness very well...much better than I would, I know....
And so it goes....
Sunday, February 21, 2010
I stated earlier that I didn't want to further terrify my Gussie by taking her to the vet on Monday, as she's gone quite blind. Upon further reading on-line, I am going to talk to the vet, get a tranquilzer (for her, not me), and take her in...As a responsible pet owner, I owe that to her. It's not about money, but rather, she's terrified of vets, and now, she's in darkness...anyway..that's my decision.
Years ago, a wonderful comedienne, Gilda Radner, who was one of the first of the "Saturday Night Live" crew, died of ovarian cancer. Before she died, she wrote a wonderful book called, "It's Always Something". No, I do not have ovarian cancer (praise God), but I am having to look at life with that title in mind. There will always be "something"....it's how we deal with it that matters. I read the other day about people who live to be a hundred (I don't want to), and one of the common threads they shared was being resilent....rolling with the punchs...and there have been some pretty hard punches of late. I've decided to "roll on".
I know this is a "design blog", but haven't had much opportunity nor even interest in design lately. Sad but true, as it has been a passion of mine...that said, I do have a job coming up (again, praise God), small, but nevertheless....but, there are some things I would like to share with you....one of which is about that angel...
She belonged to Aunt Lily, who, if you read back a short ways, you will find my tribute to her after she passed. My husband and I went to Tennessee for her memorial service, and we were staying at my mother-in-law's home. The angel was one of Lily's many music boxes, or in this case, a musical angel. She was sitting on the dresser in our bedroom, and when I entered the room, she began to play...I wasn't treading heavily, in fact I was across the room from her. I called my husband into the room, and we stood transfixed. It was playing "Silent Night", and all it played was the last line, "sleep in heavenly peace". We both agreed that was Lily's way of reaching out to us.....very comforting....So, sleep in Heavenly peace", dear Lily.
Yesterday, I had a terrible revelation; my beautiful, grey, Gussie has suddenly gone completely blind. Just yesterday morning, she was gazing out at the squirrel in the bird feeder, crying to get out...I let her out, and she roamed the porch a bit, and then, came in...she certainly could see then. About an hour later, I went into the laundry room, where the kitty food, etc. were, and she was sitting there, staring intently (or so I thought) at something. I tried to see what she was looking at, but nothing unusual was there. Then, she walked right into a wall, poor baby. My first inclination was to rush her to the emergency vet, but my husband (who has his doctorite in anatomy and cellular biology), looked at her, and said it appeared she'd had a stroke, and to take her in on Monday. She was purring, and didn't seem in pain...in fact, she was much less concerned about it than I. She can find her litter box, her food and water, get up-and-down on the bed, find her little, round basket she sleeps in, and let me love on her.
I stood in the shower for quite awhile yesterday, sobbing, (I do my crying in the shower)...finally just broke...and now, I must move forward...Miss Gussie seems non-plussed about the whole thing. I've decided to stop in at the vet's and talk to them, as she is terrified of vets, cars, carrying cages, and now that she's blind, I think it would be too much for her...besides, she's very smart. I can sneak out to the garage, and quietly get her carrying cage down from the shelf, yet, somehow, she knows it, and retreats under the bed, out of my reach.
Now, aren't you glad I'm back, and I've shared all this cheery "stuff" with you?
Humor has gotten me through so many of life's traumas, and I lay in bed this morning, trying to compose a Country Western song, using the latest events, but nothing would rhyme...oh well.
Thursday, February 4, 2010
Rather than just disappear...I wanted to post that I am taking a break..for many reasons..You may have noticed the deterioration of my; posts, moods, and computer skills (of which there were few to begin with). Also, my family is in crisis right now, and all of my attention and strength must go towards trying to fix the unfixable- Everyone has these times in their lives, and if they don't, they are so fortunate. I am blessed with a wonderful family for the most part..then there is the "shallow end of the gene pool", which causes great heartache and strife..which noone wants to hear about.
Sooo. When I return, towards the end of the month, I promise to have this blog up-and-running, and a new attitude...God Bless, and see you then.
By the way, I am still following allya'll's blogs, but this )#$*%#$ computer won't let me leave comments..I admire you all greatly.